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5 yr old in ballet, out of absolutely nowhere: “i hate trump. he’s such a… he’s so dumb.” 
[general agreement from the group]
5 yr old: “did you hear he’s quitting?” 
me: “oh, believe me, i wish.” 
5 yr old: “he’s quitting and his cat will be the next president.” 
me: “…definitely be a better president than him.” 
5 yr old, with a sigh: “it’s a lie; i lied about him quitting. i wish he would. actually, i wish he would just quit his life.” 
another kid, delighted: “death!”

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